Do not judge me because I laugh too much or too loud
Do not think I know not pain
You do not know the tears I hide
My jokes & jests are just so much camouflage.
I CHOOSE to be the happy clown
For one caustic tear like acid waste will erode this dammed wall—
And teardrops shored will then flood my soul.
You know not my fear, my guilt, my shame
The mistakes I’ve made the choices that blame
The monsters hiding beneath my bed
Those who call my name
The demons whose taunts linger in my head
screaming, clawing, accusing, condemning my soul.
The laughter chases back the night
Shoves my tormentors back into our shadowy corner of Hell—
They wait…straining at the edge of the light
Biding their time
Seeking the moment when they can sink their steely fangs into my fragile flesh
and devour my Peace.
They will not consume me.
I choose to be happy
I choose to be free
They will not enslave me
I will NOT give the monster succor!
They will not reign over me…Master supreme.
For I am the Captain of my destiny
Mistress of my soul
I shall not go quietly into the darkness
I will sing, I will dance, I shall give my words wings
For Laughter is the Night Light that keeps the darkness at bay.